I feel like when someone close to you passes away, there are two dates that are going to stick with you - the day they passed and their birthday.
In my 24 years of living, I have had three good friends taken from me. Two of them, two that I graduated with, are tattooed on my wrist. It's my way of taking them with me everywhere I go, but I still think of them on the above mentioned days.
Two months ago would have been Cynthia's 24th birthday. But we didn't get to celebrate because five years ago today she was taken from us. I say "we" and "us" because she had A LOT of friends.
And honestly, that's a bonus I think to facebook. I didn't get sad to be reminded of it. I was happy to see everybody talking about how much they missed her. Made me realize how much of an impact she had.
I don't want to be entirely depressing, but I want to mention one story. Cynthia lived with her grandmother and the house they stayed in had friends come over so often that we all sort of became another family.
At her funeral, I got ready to go in and say my hellos to everybody and tried my best to "be a man" and not cry or anything. But when I walked in, I locked eyes with her grandma who gave me a sad/proud look. She hugged me and said "she really loved you guys" and all I could say in reply was "we really loved her too." And then, of course, I lost it.
Her grandma joined facebook not too long ago and we all friended her and I thought it was really awesome to see her post this as a status:
"Today marks five long years and yet it seems like yesterday since Cynthia died. She was one special gal.I'm glad to see so many of you remember and care. I love you guys !!!!! Love Grams Our angel is watching over you"
Recently I got the new Yellowcard cd and this song really stuck with me and it's what I posted today.
"All I can do is keep you closer now
'Cause I know your somewhere out there looking down
Wherever you are (Wherever you are)
I hope you can see me smiling"
I've been very fortunate in my life to have not lost a close friend so young. Honestly, I'm not even sure I'd know how to handle that. It's nice that you continue to honour her each year - especially with a tattoo - that's intense.
ReplyDeleteYou're a good guy!
I have been thinking about her a lot lately. With that platinum blonde hair and thick country accent. Thanks for this.
ReplyDeleteYou know, I remember your post about her from last year and I think it's really cool that despite getting older, you not only recognize the significant loss but how lucky you were to know her. People sometimes only focus on one or the other, but rarely both.
ReplyDelete